There are many layers to being in a LOVE relationship. Just when you think you have discovered all there is to know, yet another layer appears. Some people get scared of the layers they ‘have a moment’ where they think to themselves ‘whoa I better put on the brakes here for a minute, because this is getting DEEP!’ Yet instead of stopping the flow and stopping your progress that is the very time to delve deeper, go deeper, explore what is there and what is showing up. There is deliciousness in the layers like the rich layers of your favorite cake or pastry. The creation process may be a delicate balance to get it just right but the end result is soooooo worth it!!!
I think that is what keeps us interested and keeps relationships moving forward by discovering the layers. What is most important to ask yourself – what are you personally focusing on? Are you focusing on the challenges, the differences between you and another? Or are you focused on the wonderful things about them and how grateful you are to have them in your life? By focusing on the positive aspects of the other person you can literally turn your relationship into the most satisfying, delicious and sweetest one you have ever known. What are you focusing on today?
My picture this week comes from an exquisite bouquet of roses I received from my beloved, one of the leaves just thrilled me to pieces!!!!
Affirmation: Today I make room for LOVE in my life.
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Now that Valentine’s Day is over for another year I would like to share with you what I learnt yesterday…..
I have decided that the best, most joyful, most peaceful way to be on Valentine’s Day is to have absolutely NO EXPECTATIONS at all. No expectations as to how the day will unfold, no expectations as to what gift you may or may not receive, no expectation as to what you partner may or may not do or say on that day. Why? Because in letting go of how you think things should be, you make room and space for the most WONDERFUL things to show up!!! Things that are EVEN BETTER than you thought possible!!! I have come to understand when we want something so ‘badly’ it squeezes the life force out of it and actually stops us from obtaining it. It also puts a lot of pressure into the situation. Yes we can have desires, yes we can have things we want however, once we know what those desire are, it is then necessary to relax, to be easy about them and to just go about enjoying yourself and your day. Making yourself happy first is vitally important. Then everything else that shows up is a huge bonus!!!
Yesterday I also attended a wedding and something struck me so profoundly that I have now come to understand – just because you get married, does not mean you have any more LOVE or joy than those who are not married. I think some people see marriage as a way to secure their LOVE but that’s not true. The LOVE must be there from the beginning and it can fully and completely exist within the context of marriage or without it. It’s our personal preference about marriage that decides if we choose to experience it or not. You can CREATE GREAT LOVE at any time, with anyone you truly LOVE, under any circumstances in all ways.
My picture this week was taken at the Valentine’s Day wedding!!!
I encourage you this week to think about your idea of GREAT LOVE and what that actually is for you.
“The secret to a happy marriage is if you can be at peace with someone within four walls, if you are content because the one you love is near to you, either upstairs or downstairs, or in the same room, and you feel that warmth that you don’t find very often, then that is what love is all about.” – Bruce Forsyth (British Television Presenter & Entertainer)
LOVE is not EITHER/OR. LOVE is constant. LOVE is all the time. If you want to have a successful relationship you don’t get to pick and choose when you want to LOVE. You either LOVE or you don’t. You are either in or you’re out. You are either loving or you are not.
People think LOVE can be turned on and off like a tap, it cannot. LOVE is a river that flows all the time, constantly and with free flowing movement.
Why do some people stop themselves from having healthy loving relationships? They put up all kinds of excuses and roadblocks in the way. I think it’s partly fear of the unknown or fear of repeating the past or fear of the future. True Love if you allow it, is soft, gentle and sure. It’s easy and comfortable. Over the years I have come to understand that moving into your fear, leaning towards it actually dissipates it and lessens the fear a great deal. A lot of people stay stuck on the sidelines, never really moving forward or backward just staying stagnant because that is what feels most comfortable for them. Not messing with what is makes them feel safer somehow.
If you want to CREATE GREAT LOVE, if you want to experience the most joyful, magical and exquisite type of LOVE then you will need to take risks and take action! Inspired action! Divine action! The type of action that busts through your level of fear. Take a step forward. What are you waiting for?
LEAP. MOVE FORWARD. CREATE A GRAND GESTURE.
Show LOVE that you want it. Demonstrate it. Prove you are interested in it. And you are willing to do what is necessary to LET IT IN!
This week is a call to ACTION. What step forward will you take?
My picture this week was taken on my trip to the mall. A coincidence? I think not…..
“We are built for relationship. Connection. Partnership. Not because the other person “completes us” but because we all yearn to share this life with a person, we love and who love us.” – Mastin Kipp (Author of the Daily Love blog)
Love needs to be a priority in our lives. What does the word priority mean? According to the dictionary it is somebody or something important. We can have all the money in the world, we can have the most celebrated and successful career however nothing is as important as LOVE. There is an old yet true saying that money won’t keep you warm at night” and it’s true. Yes we need money to be able to support ourselves and take care of our needs of course that is important on a physical level. However LOVE is vital to us on a Soul level. Everyone needs LOVE. Real LOVE. We all deserve to have the most exquisite kind of LOVE in our lives. It’s up to us though to let it in. It is there, it is here, it is present, we all have the opportunity to experience it. Whether you let it in, allow it, cultivate it, encourage it, promote it, make it a priority in your own life is up to you.
What some people don’t understand is that unconditional LOVE helps us in so many ways. It gives us the courage and the confidence to have a successful career and to reach the heights we desire for ourselves. Love is the base. Love is the foundation. Love is the launching pad to these other external things we want for ourselves. Yes you can obtain these things without LOVE however LOVE is the springboard which allows you to jump higher, dream bigger and go further than you ever thought possible. If you want to shine brighter then give even more LOVE to those who are important in your life.
Will you make LOVE a priority in your life this week?
My picture this week comes from Las Vegas, even in a place where money is king, LOVE still shines as a bright beacon of light.
“Perpetual devotion to what a man calls his business, is only to be sustained by perpetual neglect of many other things.”
― Robert Louis Stevenson (Scottish Novelist & Poet)
Some people believe that Love and relationships are difficult. Some people create a lot of drama around Love and relationships. They think that is the way they are supposed to be. It is perhaps what they have been used to and are familiar with. However, I believe in a different kind of Love. A Love that is simple, smooth, easy and comfortable. Love that builds and progresses over time in a gentle, nurturing way. The type of Love where you know you are truly loved and cared about. Love that is stable, real, honest and true. Love that is exciting, fun, passionate and delicious! Love that doesn’t always have to move mountains but can be just as solid as one. The type of Love where you get to be yourself. Love that gives you the wonderful opportunity to be Loving towards another.
I was recently looking at the word relationship and I discovered something very fascinating. Look at what happens to the word relationship when you drop the first letter ‘R’…. It becomes elationship!!! Isn’t that what we all want. We want to feel elation in our relationship. Elated that in this world of over 7 billion people we have discovered someone who Loves us as we Love them – no matter what. The word elation means JOY, ECSTASY, DELIGHT, EXCITEMENT, JUBILATION! Now that is what GREAT LOVE is really all about.
I encourage you this week to find some ways to turn your relationship into an elationship.
My picture this week came to me while walking through the mall…even the heart looks elated here!!
“When you’re in love you never really know whether your elation comes from the qualities of the one you love, or if it attributes them to her; whether the light which surrounds her like a halo comes from you, from her, or from the meeting of your sparks.” – Natalie Clifford Barney (American Playwright, Poet & Novelist)
Sometimes we need to forgive the person we Love. Sometimes that’s not easy to do. Why must we forgive them? We forgive them for us, we forgive them for ourselves, we find compassion, we see through to the truth of who they really are. We forgive them so that we don’t carry around the anger or resentment which is so detrimental to our health and our well being. LOVE conquers all. I truly believe that statement.
Forgiveness is defined as the intentional and voluntary process by which a victim undergoes a change in feelings and attitude regarding an offense, lets go of negative emotions such as vengefulness, with an increased ability to wish the offender well.
Forgiveness frees us. It releases the tightly held negative energy and emotions. It makes room for more positive energy to fill that space. Forgiveness heals us.
Who might you need to forgive today?
My picture this week arrived at dinner time……
“Eskimos had fifty-two names for snow because it was important to them: there ought to be as many for love.
– Margaret Atwood (Canadian Poet, Novelist)
Sometimes when you don’t feel good or you are out of alignment it’s easy to take it out on the person who is closest to you. We can unconsciously know that even if we are unkind, the person that we feel safe with will accept us even in our times of distress.
For some of us it can be difficult to express how we feel especially when we don’t feel our best. It is important though when you see that you took your frustrations out on someone you Love to immediately let them know that you Love them and apologize to them and take responsibility for your actions. This is one way to Create Great Love. It’s important to communicate especially in the difficult or challenging times. If you know you can talk honestly to each other, you can overcome anything.
To me unconditional Love is accepting your partner as they are. Know that their unkind behavior is not the truth of who they really are, they were just disconnected from themselves for that time. Kindness and compassion go a long way in creating a great relationship. We all have different perspectives and come from different backgrounds. What triggers one person, may have no effect on another. With kindness we can find common ground with each other and work through any perceived challenges.
My picture this week came to me in a container of pretzels!!! GREAT LOVE can be right in front of you, it might just take a slightly different perspective to see it.
“Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.” – Henry van Dyke (American Author & Educator)